Short Term Mission Trip
I’m going on a short term mission trip to Bosnia. We leave July 27th and return on Aug 5th.
Read all about our team on the blog we’ve setup:
http://bosyoufes08.blogspot.com/
We will be posting things along the way and while we are there. You can subscribe to that blog and get e-mailed when we’ve added new postings.
Mossy Creek with Avery
Avery was offered her mother’s old spot at Mossy Creek and she gratefully accepted it. I spent all of Saturday there and most of Sunday with her. I wanted to be there to speak with the customers who hadn’t heard the news. It turned out to be more of a grief-processing weekend for me than I had anticipated. I was able to be sad about a number of things surrounding the show, the lack of my sweetie, a number of the old-time exhibitors who are no longer there, and others. I’m very glad I went even though it was hard.
Remaining Dolls
I also wanted to pick people’s brains about what to do with the few (approx. 20) dolls that are unsold. I want to honor Trudie and her faithful customers in where they go. I got some good thoughts from a number of people. I’ll mull it over and let God let me know when the time is right for a decision.
Springtime in Roswell
Everything is in bloom and pretty. (sarcasm) Oh boy, yet another opportunity to grieve. (end of sarcasm). The flower beds are a mess. Weeds are sprouting up everywhere and I am not a happy weeder. And the flowers popping up (all on their own) are really pretty. And it all is yet another reminder of Trudie.
Mission Trip
The newest adventure for me is that I’ve signed up for a mission trip with my church. Our team is meeting to plan out what we will do for the festival. We will have several meetings including a retreat before we go on July 27th.
I’m looking for some people who would be willing to be a prayer partner or a financial support partner. Send prayers to – well you know where. Send financial support to me. We have to turn in our money as a team. Make the check out to “North Point Missions” and my address is:
4911 Sturbridge Cres. NE
Roswell, GA 30075
The First Bloom
A couple of weeks ago I took this photo of the first bloom of Spring. It’s from daffodils that we got from our parent’s home in Oak Ridge many years ago. Trudie transplanted them to Columbia and then moved them here.
Since then, many more flowers are starting to show their colors. Trudie loved her flowers.
Vacation
I took a vacation last weekend. I flew down to visit Ralph and Valerie for a long weekend. I drove over to Kennedy Space Center and toured the place with some cousins. We were very lucky because we got to see the shuttle Endeavour sitting on the launch pad awaiting it’s liftoff a couple of days later. I won’t mention their names because one of the them had to call in “sick” to come up for the day. Here’s a link to my web album.
I later got to visit with my Aunt Dot whom I hadn’t seen in many, many years.
Then on Saturday, Ralph, Valerie, and I went to see a spring training baseball game. The Braves played the Houston Astros. The Braves didn’t win but we had fun anyway.
Continuing
I’m keeping busy. I’m taking one day at a time. I am learning how to have fun. I’m serving at church a lot. Every once in a while I’ll get ambushed by something that reminds me of a good time with Trudie and I’ll be sad. But for the most part, I’m just doing what is the next-right-thing and leaving the rest to God.
Anniversary
Today, 2/22, is the three month anniversary of the night Trudie died. I’ve been very sad this morning. I’m again grieving that the light of my life is now dark. The weather today is chilly and gloomy to boot (39 degrees F and raining). So I’ve been feeling and letting myself feel my sadness this day. I was told that anniversaries would trigger another “wave” of grief and it has. This too shall pass.
Sari Update
I talked to Charles a day or so ago and he says that Sari is settling right in on the farm. He says she shows a strong aversion to being in the house and she loves to romp around all their open land. I said that the aversion is probably due to all the time we had to keep her cooped up in our house while there was no one home.
He reports that they are extremely please that she gets along well their family members young and older alike. She gets along well with all their extended family who stop by to visit as well as all of their kids. He said she and the incumbent alpha-female have had a couple of fights. After the first fight one came away with a hurt paw and after the second fight the other came away with a hurt paw. So it seems that Sari and she have developed a mutual respect for each other and have called a truce. He said that Sari has formed friendships with younger males there and is just having a grand time.
I, in the mean time, am enjoying not having to worry about her needs for potty or companionship. The house does seem quieter and I’m adjusting fine to that.
I think we are both better off with this arrangement.
One less Volvo
I decided to donate the 940 to a charity. Selling it myself would have been a lot of hassle. And this way I’ll get some tax credit when I file next year. Also, the charity plans to give it to a staff member who is need of transportation. So it really is a win-win move. I’ve not decided what to do with the 240 yet.
Mission Trip
I’ve been accepted to go with a group of folks from my church to Bosnia Herzegovina. We will be there from Jul 27, 2008 to Aug 04, 2008. The details of the trip are here. You’ll be hearing more about it later…
[paraphrasing Mr Miagi:] “one beep, lock on; two beeps, lock off”
I now have a car that beeps! My sister sold me her former car. It is a great car. It is a 1998 Lexus ES 300. It’s such an upgrade from the Volvos I have been driving. I will donate or sell the Volvos. They have been faithful servants to our family now for many years. But, it is time to move on. When I drive it now I have a new sensation that I’ve not felt since I owned a 280 ZX. I feel pushed back in my seat when I push on the gas. WoW! And it gets just as good of gas mileage as the Volvos. Thank you, Millie!
Valentine’s Day
Valentine’s Day was a rough one. I have had trouble the last two or three weeks avoiding the “sea-of-red” isles in the stores. It was such a strong reminder of my loss. Next year it will be less so. This too shall pass.
A Letter expressing my feelings of the care we received
I composed a letter right after Trudie died. But just like Jesus says about plank in my own eye, I wanted to let it “marinade” and to clean out any of my own issues.
I ran it by many people and asked their opinion. Then I went into “I got to get it just perfect” mode. And so I fretted, I grieved, and I got scared. So I just put it aside.
This week I decided it was time to send it. Well, to he honest, I had some help from some friends who gave me a loving K.I.T.A. to get it done [definition: Kick In The … you get the idea].
So today I made one or two minor tweaks, printed it, and now it is waiting in my outgoing mail. Is it perfect? Probably not; but it’s the best I can do now.
You can read my St Joseph’s Nursing Comments from Google Docs.
Relief
I’m glad to get it out the door. I don’t know what is going to “hit the fan” but I’m not in control of that. I’m glad that I’ve done it and I hope it will help others who have loved ones admitted to St. Joseph’s.
Sari’s new home
Yesterday I took Sari to Charles & Erline’s. They are the breeders that Trudie had found that concentrated on temperament rather than show ability. They had graciously agreed to take Sari back.
Good for her, good for me
It is really is the best for both of us. Sari will have other dogs to play with and people around her all day. I don’t have to keep relying on friends to come and let her out in the afternoon.
So it is the best for both of us. – And I am feeling a little sad. She was a pain in the ass to live with. She was demanding when I did come home. She wanted petting and she wanted petting NOW. But she was very cute and people were impressed at her beauty. And she had personality in spades. So I’ll probably miss her more than I anticipated.
What about Yoshi?
I’ve had a couple of people ask about what happened to our other male dog, Yoshi.
You probably remember that he was having a hard time getting around during the Summer. We were even talking about building a ramp off the back deck for him. His hind legs didn’t have much strength and we frequently had to help him get up by lifting his hips. Well, when Trudie came home from the physical rehab after her back surgery, she was using a walker. Trudie could get around but it was very tentatively. A time or two, Yoshi could not get out of Trudie’s way. He started having trouble getting up on his front legs too. He started to be a almost a danger to Trudie.
Trudie had a heart-to-heart talk with a dear friend and realized that it was time for Yoshi to be put to sleep. She realized that Yoshi had lived a long (he was over 12 years old) and had a happy life with us. I told Trudie that her safety was more important than keeping Yoshi. So I took him to our vet’s and they put him to sleep. That was a sad day too.
Fewer Things Accomplished
I’m surprised that I’m still suffering from “slogging.” This is what I call not getting as much done on the weekend like I used to. Each weekend I make a list of things I want to accomplish like I always have, but I’m finding that at the end I only have four or five things accomplished. I used to be able to knock out eight or 10 items each weekend. Not now.
I’m getting better. I am getting slowly better. Today, I did a dreaded, scary (for me), home-repair job. It wasn’t a big deal but it sat was square on top of one of my fear nerves. But I did it anyway. That’s the good news. The bad news is that I didn’t get much else done. I did get a pot of stew made and I vacuumed the house. I’m grateful that I was able to get done what I did.
Sari going back
I’ve been struggling with Sari. Three days a week I have time to be with her. But the four days a week I work, I hardly see her. And I still have to find someone to let her out for a potty break during the day.
This week I talked with some guys and now I’ve decided that the best thing for her and me is for her to go back to the breeders. I’ve talked with Charles and Erline and next Saturday I will take her back. It will be good for Sari because she will have a nice farm that she can run around in and other dogs to romp and play with. It will be good for me not to have to deal with the responsibility.
This has been a hard decision to make but I feel it is the right one. I know that I will initially be sad with her not around but I believe that I will soon be over it. Also, Erline said that Sari would not be going anywhere for a while so if I changed my mind, I could come and get her back. This is very gracious of them to offer this to me. I wasn’t ready a month ago to make this decision when I first blogged about it, but now I believe it the right time.
Surprise Sight
A friend of mine saw this resturant on his way to Hilton Head. I’ll let you know if I find out about where it is.
He met THE Myrtles when they were here for Trudie’s funeral. He was very impressed with the group. So he stopped to take this photo when he saw this. Thanks, Paul!
Surprise!
Late yesterday afternoon it started snowing. They hadn’t predicted snow – I remember a mention of flurries – but maybe they did and I missed it. Well, there at 5:30 PM it started coming down. Big flakes of wet, slushy white stuff. I skipped the meeting that I had planned to attend and went straight home.
Beauty
It made everything look white and pristine the way newly-fallen snow makes it look. The landscape looked like a winter wonderland.
And then the sadness hit. I wasn’t expecting snow to cause a wave of sadness but there it was. It was white and pretty and beautiful – and I couldn’t share it with Trudie. I was alone and felt very alone. The beauty of it all made me miss a beauty that used to be a big part of my life but is no longer.
So I made a batch of comfort food – spaghetti. It briefly dulled the pain but it’s still there. Oh well.
Sleep
I can’t seem to stay asleep for more than six hours lately. I go to bed early some nights and then wake and can’t go back to sleep. And then I’m nodding off in meetings. Hopefully I don’t snore. 🙂 I guess it’s time to start taking my St. John’s Wort again.